When you stop making love : It’s true what they say: If you don’t use it, you lose it. Sex is good for our body in ways we can’t even imagine. From better sleep, to a stronger immune system, to burning calories and boosting our mood, getting some is good in many ways. Of course, that also means that NOT having sex is pretty bad for us. All the benefits of sex are LOST when we start to lose out on orgasms.
That’s not to say that it’s wrong to take a sex break now and then. Life gets in the way, or we may be between relationships and it’s just not part of our daily life equation. Or we’re maybe just not in the mood.
Whether we’re not feeling our best or are under a lot of of stress, sex sometimes just stops happening. And that’s more than OK — we just need to accept that our bodies are going to respond and react in a major way.
And the part of the body that suffers most? Our vaginas, of course. Brain games keep your mind agile, cardio workouts build your heart health, weight training makes your muscles strong, and sex keeps your vagina in tiptop shape.
“Your vagina is a use it or lose it organ. Stimulation brings oxygenated, nutrient-rich blood to the vagina and vulva, which helps to keep the tissue supple, elastic, and lubricated. If you’re not having regular sex with a partner, it’s essential keep your vagina happy and healthy with masturbation. Self-pleasure brings all these benefits,” says Tristan Weedmark of We-Vibe.
Below, we’re sharing all the ways our vaginas lose out when we stop having regular sex.
1. It doesn’t get tighter— that’s a myth!
Taking a break from sex doesn’t tone the pelvic floor, “tighten” the vagina, or cause the hymento reappear.
“If it feels as though your vagina is tighter after you’ve taken a hiatus from sex, it may be more related to tension or a lack of comfort/arousal. If you’re a little nervous diving back in, take your time, use lube, and wait until your arousal levels are high before sliding anything inside,” says Dr. Jess, Astroglide’s resident sexologist.
2. It may take you longer to reach orgasm.
“When my clients take a break, they sometimes experience a little delay getting back into the groove. In most cases, this is related to their fear of ‘letting go.’ Since part of the brain (thelateral orbitofrontal cortex) shuts down during orgasmic response, the willingness to surrender to sexual sensations is necessary to orgasm in most cases,” says Dr. Jess.
This doesn’t mean that taking a break from sex is a bad idea, but simply that you may have toreacquaint your body with orgasmic sensations when/if you decide to resume sexual activity. This, of course, can be part of the fun!
3. Your sexual response changes.
If you’re taking a break from all types of sex (e.g. masturbation and vibrators), you might see a temporary change in sexual response when you resume sexual activities.
“Research shows that those who recently used a vibrator scored higher on the female sexual function index (FSFI) which includes desire, interest, lubrication, arousal, satisfaction and orgasm. This correlation suggests that it’s possible that changes to your sexual habits could (temporarily) impact sexual functioning. I want to emphasize that this doesn’t mean that you should avoid taking a break from sex, but simply that you should get comfortable with the various changes you’ll experience,” says Dr. Jess.
4. It gets a little smaller.
That’s why women complain of painful sex once they start again, says Dr. Drai, an OBGYN and women’s health expert. Anxiety plays a role in this, too. Make sure your partner employsforeplay before having sex, which will help loosen you.
5. It will become dry.
Sexual arousal helps the vagina get wet. Since lack of sex leads to less lubrication, ensure that you’re warmed up before getting sex.
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